Blossoming

"The living self has one purpose only: to come into its own fullness of being, as a tree comes into full blossom." ~ D.H. Lawrence

Though I love winter, I am enjoying this spring so much. The woods are filled with every shade of green imagineable! The trees are bursting with blossoms of every hue of pink, purple, yellow, and white. The mornings are cool and the afternoons are warm and breezy. Life feels rich and full and abundant.

I love the idea of following the natural cycle of life. Ebbing and flowing with the seasons. Hibernating in the cold. Blossoming and creating in the warmth. I also love the idea of running a marathon in the late spring. In my mind, these two thoughts actually do have a correlation!

I have always run a fall or winter marathon so I have always done long runs through the sweltering heat of the summer. Often, by this point in my training, I feel just about done, wondering why I thought running a marathon sounded like such a good plan. This experience has been much different. I love running in the cold weather and being able to build up my mileage during the winter months and do long trail runs in the cool woods has been heavenly. I have loved it and looked forward - for the most part - to all my runs this year. My marathon is in late May, and I really think it's the perfect time of year for me. I have been able to "ebb" or "hibernate" by doing solid running weeks, slowing building my mileage, not obsessing about running this winter. Now that it is spring, I am ready to do some really long runs, put in lots of miles in a week, and be ready to go in May. I'm ready to blossom!

First 20!

"Earth laughs in flowers." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I ran my first of 4 20 mile runs I'm planning in my training for this trail marathon. I haven't run that far in nearly 2 1/2 years. The weekend is supposed to be rainy and I really didn't relish the idea of running for several hours in the rain so I was very fortunate to have the afternoon off work, to have my daughter playing at a friend's house, and to have a beautiful afternoon in which to run.

I got to run on my favorite trails which was a treat for a Friday afternoon, and overall I felt really good. I had run 9 miles on Wednesday and on Thursday so my legs weren't fresh at all, but I decided to just enjoy myself and I did. I stopped occasionally and took some pictures. The woods were filled with redbuds, little purple, pink, yellow, and white flowers, tiny white butterflies, large yellow and black striped butterflies, birds, trees bursting into bloom - it was a glorious day.

Running is such a mental thing. I notice all the mental games I play with myself. I repeat a mantra in my head over and over or I breathe the word "Quiet" and try to see how long I can go without thinking - usually not very long at all! I try to just listen to the sounds around me - my footfalls on the trail, the wind in my ears, the birds calling all around me. I often can think of creative things - stories, ideas for things I want to accomplish, strings of words that sound cool together. I love looking around at the woods, trying to spot whatever creature is rustling in the dry leaves or flying through the treetops.

I am at a point in my running where I am not really focusing on finishing in a "time" or setting a personal best. I am enjoying the run, the time in the woods or out on the bridges or riverwalk. I am enjoying the feeling I get after the run - that delicious tired feeling and knowing I've done what I set out to do. I am enjoying my strong legs, the mental toughness that running inspires, the peaceful stillness my mind reaches in the woods. It's a good place to be this spring.

Spring

"Everything is blooming most recklessly; if it were voices instead of colors, there would be an unbelievable shrieking into the heart of the night." ~ Rainer Maria Rilke

Spring arrived a couple of days ago. So many colors of green are everywhere! Trees, flowers, bushes, vines are all blooming in a profusion of color. I love this time of year ~ the freshness in the air, the glorious colors, the cool mornings, the warmth of the sunshine during the day, the newness of everything.

We just got back from a wonderful family vacation and had such a special time. Though vacations are always great, getting home and back into our regular routine is always really nice too. I feel so well-rested and inspired.

This month has been a great one. I am doing very well keeping my focus on things that are important to me. I am reading, running, writing, taking photographs, spending time with my family. My mom, daughter, and I have been working on a 3-generation book project and I took the final proof to the printer today. I already have my next book project in mind and can't wait to get started on it. My marathon is in 8 weeks, and I am running a 19 mile long run this weekend.

I am excited about the possibilities of spring!

Focus

I tend to focus on one big thing in my days ~ spirituality, creativity, running! I think to a point they are all tied together for me. But then it's easy to cross a line and just focus on one. I am enjoying running a lot these days. I've signed up for a trail marathon in May and am liking following a training schedule with a goal in mind. I am at that point of being able to just run and run and not feel really sore which is cool. But... I am physically tired a lot. Then that seems to bleed over into being mentally, spiritually, and creatively tired too!

Getting out of the habit of doing things is so easy. Not carrying my camera with me when I run, not taking time to write in my journal, not making time at night to meditate, not focusing on a creative project. This month I want to focus on running but also focus on not losing sight of all the other things I want to have in my life. I have to really plan the time for my runs because they are much longer these days, but I can take my camera along. I can set aside time to write in my joural every morning. I can read in the evenings before I go to bed. I can find a creative project that inspires me an do something towards it most days.

So I will see with making a conscious effort to FOCUS that I can include all of these important aspects of my life into my days.

Simply Be Quiet

"Simply be quiet. Be with Yourself in the stillness. Do this daily. Just stop. Stop all your doingness. Stop all your thinking. Stop all your thinking. Just be for a while. Take an hour every day at dawn and give it to Yourself. Meet Your self there in the holy moment. Then go about your day. You will be a different person." ~ N.D. Walsch

I love this quote. Simply being. Not feeling the need to do or think or talk or clean house or run or eat or anything. Simply being. I wonder why this is so incredibly hard to instill in my life. That feeling of guilt when I am just sitting, just being, the feeling that I "should be" doing something.

I find time in my days to take are of my family, to keep a reasonably clean home, to provide meals for us all most days! I find time to run, to read, to shower, to write, to answer emails, to write in my journal, to do my work. And yet finding - or making - time to just be always seems to get left out, to get lost in the myriad of activities that I "need" to do.

I am really drawn to the idea of meditation. I have been for years. I made a commitment to myself in 2011 that I will incorporate meditation into my days. I have done this with varying degrees of success. My daughter and I will occasionally sit and meditate together before bed, and this is such a special time. I will sit by myself - usually before I go to bed, and sometimes just sit, sometimes repeat a word or phrase in my head, sometimes just try to be aware of my breath, occasionally I listen to a meditation cd. I like the idea of moving meditation - running for me. I can easily repeat a mantra in my head to the rhythm of my footsteps or try to focus on the feeling of my body as I'm moving or try to become very aware of my surroundings.

Sometimes I get an amazing feeling of quiet and stillness and peacefulness that overtakes me - even for the briefest of moments. I feel a deepening of my Self and feel that at those times I catch a glimpse of my very Soul. I want to cultivate more of those moments into my days, into my life.

Still Moments

"Learn to pause...or nothing worthwhile will catch up to you." ~Doug King

I have felt so much better this week and though it's been a rather stressful week at work, I've had some lovely moments of just being.

~lying in bed with my daughter as she reads to me

~snuggling with my husband in a chair not quite big enough for both of us

~having a lovely conversation with my mom

~finishing on lovely book, The Lost Hours, and immersing myself in another, Angela's Ashes

~listening to a wild storm in the night - torrential rain, howling wind - I love storms!

~running and listening to the wind whispering in my ears this morning

~really stopping and seeing a beautiful sunrise

~teaching some precious 3 and 4 years olds yesterday

Running with Others

"Jogging is very beneficial. It's good for your legs and feet. It's also very good for the ground. It makes it feel needed." ~ Charles, Schulz, Peanuts (one of my all time favorite running quotes!)

I particularly enjoy running in the woods. The solitary time, the out-in-nature feel, the animals, the quiet, the peacefulness of being in the woods are so appealing to me. Dirt trails feel so good to my body, my knees in particular!

But life dictates that if I'm going to get a run in that often I am going to be running on the road, in town, surrounded by people and buildings. One of my very favorite runs in this scenario is across several bridges spanning the river. I love the bridges in all seasons - hot and sunny, cool and misting rain, covered in snow! I often run really early in the morning and enjoy the sun rising in all its glory right over the river. Each day is totally different. Sometimes the sky is on fire with pinks, red, and oranges and other times it is covered in dark clouds with only a strip of sunlight peeking through here and there. Carrying my camera along to capture these incredible moments adds a great deal to my time spent outside.

I ran yesterday afternoon while my daughter played with a friend. I had run 14 miles on Sunday and normally would have done a short run or no run at all. Many of my runs are all about the time available though so off I went for a nice 7 mile run. I felt surprisingly good and enjoyed a really windy run! I kept seeing the same people walking or running the bridges also. The running community here is nice and friendly for the most part - people nod and wave or smile and speak. As much as I like running alone and get so much out of the solitude, I also enjoy being part of something else. Smiling at someone and knowing they are out there enjoying - hopefully! - a bit of time to themselves, soaking in the beauty of the river and sky, stretching their bodies and moving and feeling their hearts beating just like I am.